we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Randomize
