I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Randomize
