That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
