I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
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