there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
