He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
If you get laid dressed as my dad that makes me extremely uncomfortable
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
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