Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
