Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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