Everything about him screamed your future.
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
he fucked my hip out of place.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
