What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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