reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
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