Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize