the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
