I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
