Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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