Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Randomize