I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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