It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
