i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
