Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
