i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Something's wrong. Everything's on fire. Unless it was like that before. Then everything's alright.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
