so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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