that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
