Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
