Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
No he doesn’t answer my texts except for like on New Year’s Because like I was fucked up on New Year’s and he said happy new year and I told him the same and I called him dragonslayer and you can’t really recover from that
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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