i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
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