I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
