who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
Flying into Chicago for a few days, getting re-deployed in September, we should probably fuck
Kristina got the same text from you just now, she's sitting next to me, how many people did you send this to?
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Randomize