Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
When I told my mom I was having a rough time, she responded with "pop a xanax, take a nap, and when you wake up all will be right with the world." My mom is finally starting to shape up.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
I am going home. I have pee on my pants. Rachel is driving and I and drunk. It is not Rachels pee. It is my pee.
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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