you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
