I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
