Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Did I show you my penis last night?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
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