There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
