sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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