he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
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