Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Im part way to drunk.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
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