uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I have tasted many bathrooms
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
Randomize
