before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize