i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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