if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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