I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
