Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
i just learned how to squirt via google. life is good.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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