I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
