There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
Randomize
