Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Hey, my drug test is at 4:15 tomorrow. I'll meet you 5 minutes later.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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