hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Liz is crying about burritos again.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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