So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Randomize
