And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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