Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
