So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
